Slider

12.04.2013

Online Business?

Semua orang cakap.. Business online ni hanya boleh buat untuk sekadar hobi suka-suka untuk masa santai-santai, bosan-bosan.

Tapi aku cakap, "I'm going to prove them wrong."

I'm going to build this small business from the ground up. Kedai aku tak ada modal besar untuk beli 'bangunan pasang siap'. Hanya mampu bina base dia je sekarang. Tapi bina base yang kukuh. Bina dari bawah sampai jadi bangunan pencakar langit.

Ramai yang beli business "pasang siap". Modal besar, stok banyak. Tapi tak bertahan walaupun customer ramai. Sebab bagi dorang, business ni hanya untuk hobi tapi "kerja" adalah kehidupan & punca mencari rezeki utama.

Bagi aku, business adalah punca rezeki. Kerja..? I've worked only twice in my life time.

I would like to call myself an entrepreneur. One day.. someday.

Visit my online shop : Lovette

11.26.2013

Something To Keep In Mind



Jika anda hilang segala-galanya, jangan lupa,
kerana anda masih mempunyai masa depan.




Dilemma

Mengikut adat Melayu ;
"Selagi tak kaya, jangan nikah."

Mengikut Syara' Islam;
"Nak kaya, nikah."


I am halfway there. Almost there. But sometimes it seems like it's still a long way to go. Why? Because of adat. Ikut adat, kena ada duit banyak banyakkk. Ikut ada, kena buat majlis besar besarrrr. Ikut adat, kena jemput ramai ramaiiii. Tak ikut adat, kena fitnah.

Honestly, I am stuck in between. Kadang-kadang aku malas nak ikut adat sebab nak utamakan yang Syara'. Tapi bila buat macam tu, dengan umur yang sangat muda.. Mulut orang akan mengata;


  1. "Dah gatal sangat nak kahwin!"
  2. "Kena tangkap la tu."
  3. "Perut dah nak besar. Sebab tu nak cepat kahwin."


Yes memang nikah benda yang bagus. Tapi sebab hidup di Malaysia ni, dengan mindset orang yang entah apa-apa, terpaksa ikut adat sebab nak jaga maruah keluarga. Nak jaga diri dan keluarga dari difitnah.

Dan sesetengah orang akan kata, "biarlah apa orang nak kata, asalkan kita bahagia." Betul tu. Tapi kalau kita je happy tapi keluarga tak happy macam mana? Keluarga nak kita ikut adat. Sebab nak tutup mulut orang. Macam mana?????????

Dan benda akan berbalik kepada masalah pertama tadi.

Sejujurnya memang aku ada dream wedding tersendiri. Mestilah aku nak perkahwinan yang sempurna penuh adat. Starting with a proposal (walaupun dah tunang, teringin jugak!!), bridal shower (kata pon dream wedding), malam berinai, nikah. Nak pakai baju putih dengan veil yang ditempah khas kat Rizman (demand tak beragak), kalau boleh nak nikah kat dewan so keluarga belah Abah leh datang. Hantaran bertemakan putih purple yang simple tapi elegant.

Majlis bersanding pulak, kalau ikutkan hati nak buat sekali je dengan pihak lelaki. Boleh buat sekali grand terus. Grand tapi simple :) Mungkin boleh buat kat hotel kalau mampu atau golf club ke. Dinner RSVP senang sikit. So ibu tak penat. Tema wedding purple putih silver. Dikelilingi bunga hydrengea purple & putih yang diimport khas!!


Lepas bersanding, naik white horse carriage dengan Afiq. Waaah! Nak pergi mana pon tak tau. Hahahah. Over lak. Kata pon dream wedding! I'm just a normal girl after all :)



Selalunya pengantik perempuan sampai naik kuda kan? Tak nak la. Tak nak naik sorang-sorang. Nak naik dengan dia. Hek hek hek hok. 

But all I am really asking for is to be with the man who can love me even after my last breath. All I really want is to be with the one I love, legally.

For me, aku percaya rezeki tu akan datang melimpah ruah lepas kahwin. Sebab kahwin tu adalah rezeki. Dan aku bukan kahwin sebab dah tak sabar sangat atau gatal sangat atau sebab sayang sangat. Errr part sayang sangat tu betul la. The more reason aku nak halalkan hubungan aku dengan dia cepat.

Tapi yang pasti, aku nak nikah hanyalah kerana Allah.

11.15.2013

My Fav Flower

So cantik, kan?
Wish I could hold this on my wedding day ;)

11.12.2013

I Am Beautiful!




He's the only who can accept me for who I am. He's the only guy who can put up with me no matter how many times I messed up. He's the one who will fix everything even when I was the one that fucked things up. He saw my dark side, he saw my demon, but he still thinks that I am the most beautiful girl.

He's a blessing that God gave me. He's the Imam that Allah sent me, insyaAllah. He's always there, for me. Always here.. with me. He sees the beauty in me when I can only see the ugliest girl in the mirror. He brings out the best in me.

Happy 11th monthsary, Sayang 
It will be our first anniversary next month  and to many many many many more!!

I still wish that we could be like this 10 years ago, but Allah knows best. We wouldn't be here if we were together 10 years ago. 

Wǒ ài nǐ  burp~

11.07.2013

A Lil Something 'Bout Me

INFp - "The Romantic"

In a relationship you are optimistic and idealistic about the future and your goal is to create an ideal rapport between you and your partner. You are not afraid to reveal your romantic and affectionate nature and greatly depend on your emotions to guide you. You often have difficulties with coherent logical analysis and thus can never be sure about your intellectual abilities. You enjoy relations with important and influential people.



I Am What I Am

Messy, 
irritable, 

depressed, 

fragile, 

worrying, 

emotionally sensitive, 

does not like to lead,  

phobic, 

weird, 

suspicious, 

low self control, 

paranoid, 

frequently second guesses self, 

dependent, 

unproductive, 

introverted, 

weak, 

strange, 

unassertive,  
??
submissive, 
??????
familiar with the dark side of life, 

feels invisible, 

rash, 
✔ (frick!)
vain, 

anti-authority, 

heart over mind, 

low self concept, 

disorganized, 

not good at saving money, 

avoidant, 

daydreamer, 

unadventurous 



Well.. that's all pretty much about me. Wow :O

Zaman Millenium?

Zaman sekarang, boleh dikatakan semua orang ada facebook. Dari la budak 5 tahun sampailah nenek berusia 90tahun ++ . Dan boleh dikatakan semua addicted tak sudah dengan facebook. Pagi petang siang malam facebook.

Salah satu sebab aku dah tak rajin bersosial network adalah kerana facebook. Because EVERYONE IS ON FACEBOOK. EVERYONE. Parents, aunties, uncles. Especially people who loves sticking their nose into other people's butt business.

We can see puerile behaviour of these facebookers everyday. Ada yang suka bergaduh kat facebook, ada yang suka kepochi kat facebook, ada yang suka luahkan perasaan kat facebook, ada yang suka cerita hal peribadi kat facebook, ada jugak yang update conversation tak penting and tak kelakar langsung kat facebook. How can people be so dense????

Sekarang ni boleh dikatakan hari-hari ada je video panas yang tersebar kat facebook. And it goes viral in only one day! The power of "netorking". If only dorang gunakan networking tu untuk jalan yang betul. Sekarang trend, "macam comel je". Seriously aku lagi menyampah orang yang duk ajuk ajuk benda tu dari video asal. Dia buat video tu syok sendiri ke apa ke, lantaklah. Kenapa mesti sebarkan? Tak suka, delete. Tak suka, block.

Dan hari ni video baru pulak tersebar. A couple sibuk duk kiss pipi sambil jalan2 kat mall. Bila baca komen.... Penuh dengan caci maki, kononnya nak tegakkan agama. Nak menegur kerana agama, kerana Allah, tapi keluarkan kata-kata kesat. Siapa yang ajar buat macam tu?

What I'm trying to say is, what if dorang dah berkahwin? Fikir positif dulu.. Kalau dorang belum berkahwin pon, kita maki maki dia, mengumpat dia, apa beza kita dengan dia? Dah tu kita buka aib dia.. siap sebarkan sana sini.

"Kita simpan Aib org lain, Allah akan simpan Aib kita..."


I know I am not in the place nak bercakap tentang agama kerana aku sendiri tak sempurna. Tapi aku akan cuba sehabis boleh untuk elakkan dosa-dosa macam ni. Macam mana kita nak minta maaf dengan dorang? Macam mana kalau tu video orang tengok, orang share, dan orang lain lak buat benda yang sama? Kita yang tanggung semua tu. Dan alasan orang yang share tu tak masuk akal.

"Bukan niat nak buka aib dorang. Dorang yang buka aib sendiri."

So? Berhentikan sebar. Apa susah? Lepas dah share, mula mengumpat pulak. And it goes viral again. Kita tak tahu berapa ramai yang tengok hasil kita share. Pernah terfikir tak apa akan jadi kat orang yang korang buka aib tu? Macam mana orang akan pandang dorang, judge dorang. Yes, memang dorang patut amik benda tu semua sebagai pengajaran. Tapi benda ni akan effect life dorang.

Orang yang suka menyebarkan aib orang tu pon, lebih kurang je. Kalau tengok status dorang, adododoiiii!! Bila-bila masa je orang boleh buka aib dorang pulak. What if it happens to you? What will happen to your family? Pernah terfikir? Pernah dengar karma? What goes around, comes around. Mungkin bukan kena kat batang hidung sendiri. Tapi one day kita semua akan ada anak. Renung-renungkanlah.

Assalamualaikum.

11.01.2013

Some Feelings



“There are 
some feelings
you will never
find words for;

you will learn
to name them
after the ones
who gave them
to you.”

— Maza - Dohta

One Year Ago


"Someday someone will walk into your life and make you
see why it never worked out with anyone else"


It's been a year since I went to the first (and last) job interview. It has been a year since I got accepted  for my first (and last) job. Who would have thought I would ended up sitting next to him, my ex-classmate whom I haven't talk to since 2008 out of hundreds of seats! I am not exeggarating. There are more than 100 seats there. Nooo I didn't end up sitting next to any strangers and just bump into him somehow. But I had to sit next to him because my first computer that I've been assigned to got locked.

Took me more than 30 minutes to realize that I am sitting next to my ex-classmate.
Took me a month to realize that I am falling for this guy.
Took me 8 months to get engaged to him.

But exactly 1 year 1 day ago, the night before my first day at new first (and last) job, I was on facebook, scrolling down the boring news feed when I saw his update.

"Danial Afiq Azman changed his profile picture"

Eh? Sejak bila dia ada dalam friendlist? Handsome jugak dia sekarang.

And I got carried away,  drifted in my thoughts of how my life would be if I'm with him. Tiba-tiba esok duduk sebelah dia! True story. Mungkin takdir? Sebelum ni memang tak tau dia ada dalam friendlist. Tapi malam tu tiba-tiba nampak gambar dia.

Banyak yang dah berubah dalam setahun ni.

1 November 2012
I was broken..
I thought I could never be happy again..
I thought I would never find a better guy..
I thought I would never love anyone ever again..

1 November 2013
I'm happy..
I found my happiness..
I am engaged to a perfect man..
I couldn't find anyone better than my fiance..
I have never loved anyone like I love my fiance..

Thank you, for making my life better. Thank you, for making me a better person. Thank you, for everything you did for me. Thank you, for your undying love. Thank you, for dragging me out of the darkness. Thank you, for being the best for me.

Thank you, for being mine.


10.27.2013

Abah In Memories

Happy birthday, Abah.

Abah, it's been 1991 days since you left. It has been a tough 5 years 5 months 12 days without you. I admit that I'm such an stupid daughter, doing asinine things to make you disappointed, and who's stupid enough to put ego and pride over love and only realized my mistakes when I saw you lying down there on the floor, looking pale. I can never get that image out of my head no matter how hard I tried.

Abah, Tasya dah cuba jadi anak yang baik. But you made it so hard for me. Tasya nak abah bangga abah ada anak macam Tasya. Tapi mungkin tak cukup.. Mungkin tak sempat..

Semua orang nampak Tasya kuat. Semua orang ingat Tasya okay. Tapi semua orang salah. I even fooled myself, I thought I was fine. But I wasn't. I was broken. And still broken to date. I got a feeble heart, daddy. I am  affected by your death without knowing it.

Tasya perlukan abah. I really need you. Al-Fatihah.

10.26.2013

Pain Pain Go Away.



The rain is berating me in a subtle way,
calming but yet menacing my last sane mind,
as I relapse into the banal thoughts,
conquered with blurry sanity.
Will it run? Will I lost it again?
The loose grip of the right mind is taunting me inside,
that sometimes the nether world even seems like the best choice.
Rebuff me and I shall lost it again.



Why do I keep hurting when it's the last thing that I want to do? Why do I keep hurting myself when there's no reason to? I just want to bury this really really heavy burden deep down where no one could find it and dig it out back, or maybe I can just bury myself. If that's possible, I would.

I am still holding on to the last sanity I have left in me. What will happen if I lost it? I honestly don't know. What's still keeping me together is my mum and Mr Fiance. Without them, I would lose my mind.

How did I fall back in this state when I am truly happy? How is that possible?





How?

10.23.2013

♥ My Engagement Day ♥

Finally baru nak update tentang engagement day. Teruk betul. Dah sebulan lebih baru nak update. =/ Masa amat tidak mengizinkan. Sorry sorry.

Okay sambungan selepas 8am tu apa jadi?

After eight.

Selesai sudah alihkan sofa yang gabak tu hanya berdua dengan Irma! Girl power!! Bila bentang carpet tu, rasa nak berguling terus tidur sampai esok pagi! Tapi bila tengok hasil pelamin 100% siap.. terus tak jadi nak tidur.

Mickey the Hamster dah rasmikan dulu.

"Can't believe I am getting engaged"

Memang itu je yang bermain di fikiran. Dan di mulut. Sampai semua orang meluat. Okay fine :( . 

Rasa nak penat macam nak pengsan pon ada. Rasa nervous tu hilang terus sebab penat sangat. Yelah tidur berapa minit je kan. Tapi nasib baik lah Irma baik hati tolong kemaskan bilik yang dah jadi tongkang pecah tu. Rasa macam battery dah kong dah. Baru nak charge kejap, sedara belah ibu sampai pulak.


Cakap pon dah melalut. Rasanya kalau zombie bercakap dengan dorang, dorang lagi faham bahasa zombie kot daripada bahasa aku.





Hal-hal dapur semua makcik makcik yang tolong. Ibu entah hilang ke mana. Memang huru-hara masa tu. Sangat huru hara. Meja makan kat luar tak pasang lagi!

Make Up Artist

Baruuuuuuuuu je nak baring kejap, Along & MUA dah sampai. My MUA better be damn good! I look worse than a zombie! I looked like a panda zombie!


He was damn good. Dan dia sangat penyabar orangnya. Walaupun sampai satu tahap dia kunci terus bilik. Hahah. Banyak sangat gangguan & masa sangat suntuk! Ibu keluar beli barang-barang lain. Tiba-tiba semua sampai. Aku dengan nak make up lagi, nak sambut tetamu lagi.. Lepas tu nak call ibu & videographer sebab nak suruh ibu jemput dia. Telephone memang tak lepas dari tangan. Jam dah nak pukul 11. Penat semua jadi hilang sebab stress!!

Meja makan kat luar Along pasang & susun sorang-sorang! Thank you thank you. I love youuu! Time tu aku sangat-sangat perlukan Afiq. Kalau dia ada, mesti benda semua tak huru-hara macam ni, kan? Mesti dia dah tolong settlekan meja, sofa, semua.. Well I guess that answered every question I had in my head. I need him. He's the one. :)

Let the picture speaks for itself.
Sakit okay buat sanggul :(
Atau mungkin dia geram sangat?

That expression.
PRICELESS!

Final touch.
My MUA is AWESOME!!

Before & After.
Mata bengkak tak tidur!

Sangat puas hati.
Tak nampak pon macam tak tidur.


Siap je make up, terus baru green light untuk pihak lelaki gerak untuk bertandang.

This Is It


Bila Afiq cakap dia dah sampai bawah... I was like......... Fook fook fook fook!!! Ohh shooot!!! OH SHOOOOOOOOOOT! $%^&*&^%$#
This was how I react.
Literally.

Keluar bilik make up, nak pergi bilik sebelah.. tengok orang dah penuh. Entah bila tiba-tiba ramai orang lak ni. Pihak lelaki belum masuk lagi. Duk mundar-mandir dalam bilik macam kartun kat atas tu. Sorang, sorang kawan aku yang aku sempat jemput masuk bilik. Semua jemput last minute actually. Sebab sangat busy, semua benda DIY. Sampai lupa nak jemput semua :( Maaf sangat kepada sesiapa yang tak dijemput. Tak apa.. ni majlis tunang je. Buat pon simple je. Kahwin nanti confirm dijemput insyAllah.

Sempat posing kejap.

Bila dengar je kat luar dah bising.. dah tau dahhh pihak lelaki dah masuk. Rasa nak pengsan dah. Time tu masih tak percaya aku dah nak tunang. Tapi bila tengok inai kat tangan.. dan sepak sikit muka.. betul lah real. Sakit!


Perbincangan pon dimulakan. Pak Anjang yang wakilkan daripada pihak perempuan, dan pakcik Afiq dari pihak lelaki. Lama gak dorang bincang. Lagi la bertambah nervous. Ada gak cuba curi-curi dengar tapi tak dengar.

Bila dorang panggil je keluar, rasa macam jantung terkeluar & lari. Nasib baik ada pengapit hihihi. Kurang la sikit, kan. Yelah at least ada orang leh sambut kot kot terpengsan ke on the way pergi pelamin.

Tengah fikir macam mana nak duduk ni.
Susahnyaaa! Nasib tak beli baju ketat.

I've tried my best to give my best smile.
Ini je termampu.

Tapi bila tengok video... teruknya aku senyum!! Muka macam nak menangis pon ada. Tapi memang time tu aku dah cuba senyum!!! Tapi kenapa tak jadi?? Kenapaaaa??!

See? Itu muka aku cuba senyum.
Macam mana kalau tak cuba?

Masa berpantun antara pihak lelaki & perempuan.
Terima kasih kepada Along sebab buat hajat ku tercapai.

Engaged To My Mr Perfect

Officially engaged.


Baru dapat senyum ikhlas.


Perasaan masa tu? Lega. Lega sebab semua berjalan dengan lancar walaupun semua siap last minute. Alhamdulillah dengan izin Allah, aku telah bergelar tunangan orang. Tunang Danial Afiq


PICTURE TIMEEEE!!

The queen of my heart.

Along & Kak Ayu.

Future in laws, insyAllah.

His auntie auntie yang super sporting.

Auntie Ajai & his mom :)


Adik dia yang sangat comel niii ♥♥



Kawan dari sekolah rendah datang jauh dari JB!!
Thank you so much Ekaaaaaaaaaa ♥

 

Believe it or not, my maplestory family :)
Momma & Mun.

His best friend in primary school, my best friend in secondary school.

Fanabanana my twin!
Your turn is next bebeh!

My best friends forever and evahhh!

Along segamat & bakal kak ipar hihi.

Last but not least.. Irma..

Without whom, everything is impossible.
If not for her, we wouldn't be together today.
Without her, my special day would be a mess!
Thank you so much 


♥ Mr Fiance 







Barang Hantaran


Pihak perempuan

1. Sireh Junjung
2. Bunga rampai
3. Kemeja
4. Kasut
5. Set tali pinggang & wallet
6. Chocolate
7. Bodyshop
8. Kek
9. Buah







 Pihak Lelaki

1. Cincin
2. Sireh junjung
3. Bunga rampai
4. Telekung
5. Beg & kasut
6. Kek
7. Kuih halwa






Perasaan bila dah bergelar tunang orang?? 
Macam ni ha.

imageimagePhotobucketimage

lepas tu macam ni..


Penat semua dah tak terasa langsung. Rasa tak percaya tu ada lagi. Sejak azali aku memang dijadikan macam ni. Bila perkara tu sedang berlaku, aku wat lek wat peace wat chill je~~ Lepas tu? Bergantung lah sama ada nak menangis seminggu, sebulan, setahun.. Ataupun senyum seumur hidup.

Tak makan, tak tidur, tak rest.. Ingat dah tunang dah settle keeee? Banyak lagi benda nak kena buat okay!! Orang yang last makan. Lauk pon dah habis T_T . 

Meja makan nak kena bukak balik. Sofa nak kena bawak masuk dalam balik. Pelamin nak kena bukak. Arghhhhhhhh! But first kena hantar videographer balik dulu.

Inilah videographer kitorang.
Sampai macam tu ha dia ambil video. 

Tukar baju je. Rambut dah macam mak datin sesat!

Lepas hantar dia balik, singgah beli cool blog. Lepas tu hilang ingatan. Sebab dah pengsan. Pengsan dalam kereta je laah.

Tibalah malam sebelum bukak pelamin! Sayangnya nak bukak pelamin :( Penat pasang tau. 

Gambar last before bukak.

Sesi bukak membukak ni Irma dah hilang. Kesian dia. Baru nak dapat tidur.. Dia pon lagi penat kot sebab dia banyak tolong mengemas masa aku dah start relax bila make up & sesi bergambar. Post-engagement turn Along & Kak Ayu lak tolong.
Lepas semua dah selesai... sesi potong cake & makan Dominossss!! Yeahhh! Sayang nak potong sebenarnya. Cake cantik! Cake hantaran dari pihak lelaki. 






Lepas tu? TIDUR!! Esok baru sambung senyum.

Sampai sinilah cerita hari pertunanganku.. Tapi ni bukan penghujung. Ini hanyalah permulaan jalan cerita kami. Semoga kisah kami berakhir dengan nafas terakhir di dunia ini dan kekal di jannah. We're halfway there :)

I'm engaged